So, there is an hour (roundtrip) where I’m standing on a jam packed train with nothing to do, but look at my phone. It’s either that or awkwardly graze someone’s boob.Read More
I’ve been quiet for some time. When I finished my last blog post (please hold while I go back and look what it was), life was grand! I was on a spiritual journey and Parker and I were in a rhythm. My mind wasn’t cluttered with extra noise — unless you count the fact that “The Ants Go Marching 2 x 2” was on constant repeat. I was enjoying my time at home. While it was the hardest work I’ve ever known, it also didn’t feel like work. It was just me and Parker. I understood his language, I was in awe watching him develop, and I found time during the week to enjoy a daytime IPA (or two). Then, as often is the case, life took a hard left.Read More
First of all, going into social situations like that are immensely challenging for me. Aside from the constant flow of butt crack sweat, my mouth gets dry and I don’t know what to say. Seriously, Parker has a more robust vocabulary than I do in those situations. I worry about my armpits, my breath and my nose hairs. After I do the small talk thing with someone, I replay the conversation and wonder if I said the right thing, what did they think, how did I come across? It’s annoying painful.Read More
As I’ve gone through some of the decision making process this week, the only other thing I could think to do was to seek the counsel of my dear friend, Adele. I kept asking myself, “what would Adele do?”Read More
I was so incredibly lucky to grow up in a family of educators. They taught me that learning is fun and there is a great big world to explore through books. I didn’t have many plans when we officially became Dad & Papa. I left most of that stuff up to Travis. But, one thing that I was pretty adamant about was that we would read to Parker each morning and night (and one of those books had to be an ABC book). I know. I’m coo-coo (as Parker sometimes says). We even have visitors read to him. Anyone who spends the night at our house, get ready - you’ll be reading.Read More
So, I’ve decided to listen with the an open heart. I’m not sure what this year will hold for me, or the family; however, I’m beyond excited about the unknown. To kickstart the year (and my cleanse), I just want to listen. I need lots of help with this, so I ordered the book by Sharon Salzburg, “Real Happiness. The Power of Meditation.” It’s a 28-day program designed to help people “defuse stress, experience greater tranquility, find a sense of wholeness, strengthen our relationships and face our fears.” Those are all of the things that I’ve been searching for, so I’m going for it! But, a 28-day meditation program? That's intimidating as hell.Read More
Parker was over at a friend’s house for a birthday party, and he was fascinated by the little pretend kitchen. We may have a future chef on our hands. So, my mom, his grandmother, his Tara, got him one for Christmas. I had to put it together. Somehow, I’ve become the one who puts stuff together. I’m Santa’s “helper," although I’m not sure I’m qualified. I hate reading instructions, get easily frustrated, and love to procrastinate. I'll set the scene. Instruction sheets are all over the house, there’s missing screws, extra bolts and lots of “what the eff is this for?”. I expect my pink slip from Santa any moment. The kitchen took four hours and eighteen minutes to complete. And, one of the doors doesn’t close, because I put the hinge on backwards.
Ah, the joys of the holidays.
These are the times that you need a good drink. So, I asked our friend Emily (the Master Sommelier) for some holiday recommendations.Read More
When we decided to adopt, I had absolutely no clue what the end result would be. Would our dream of starting a family ever come true? Adopting a baby is one of those things that you openly (and uncomfortably) talk about with loved ones and strangers, quietly plan for all of the possibilities, and secretly tuck away your fears that it may never actually happen. It’s a learning process. You learn about your own insecurities, doubts and biases. You learn to rely on your partner for comfort, reassurance and balance. Finally, you learn to appreciate the journey (at some point).
But, what about our birth mother’s journey? I think about the day we left the hospital every day. While my heart was filled with all-consuming love for my son, it simultaneously broke for her. I always find myself wondering how she is doing. I often catch myself trying (and completely failing) to imagine what it’s like from her perspective — especially now, during the holiday season.Read More
Welcome to my world. The following is an accurate account of what happens during one of Parker’s naps.
After dutifully picking up and cleaning around the house (that part’s a little fuzzy, but I’m pretty sure it’s accurate), I sat down to write. I stared at a blank screen and my mind went wild. I never expected to be a father. I read a book about open adoption when I was in my early twenties. I thought, “how cool, but it will never happen to me.” I’ve always known I wanted to be a dad. It’s in my DNA. It’s a massive part of my identity at the moment."
Like earlier in the week, I went out by myself this week, to an “adult” birthday party. I was flying solo (and exhausted). I was introduced as the guy who has a kid, people asked about Parker, and I missed Parker 99% of the time I was there. Even when I’m not with him, it seems my life has been taken over by Parker. Which is understandable. I have the best kid in the world. He makes me laugh so hard. He’s so sweet. I mean c’mon. His favorite thing to do right now is a big family hug. And, he keeps saying, “more.” So, we end up doing like 10 family hugs before the day officially gets started. I want the best for this kid, and I’ll do anything to make sure he has an incredible life.
Record scratch plays in my head. “Dear God, am I a helicopter parent?”Read More